


Blossom

by livefree_13



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Confessions, First Kiss, First Love, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, M/M, Mild Angst, Pining, Slow Burn, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:14:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24843634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livefree_13/pseuds/livefree_13
Summary: Falling in love with Yu Narukami was the easy part. The hard part was everything else.
Relationships: Hanamura Yosuke/Narukami Yu, Hanamura Yosuke/Persona 4 Protagonist, Hanamura Yosuke/Seta Souji
Comments: 150
Kudos: 326
Collections: Souyoweek 2020





	1. Practice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Souyoweek 2020, I decided to make one, long story, using each prompt as a chapter. This first chapter is the start of Yosuke's journey and will take place mostly from his POV. 
> 
> June 21: ~~Father's Day or~~ Cloudy

_[Set May of Third Year, 2012]_

_I love him._

For the dozenth time that day, just as he had for the past week, Yosuke spoke these words in his mind. Each time he did it, the sentence hit him a little differently. Sometimes it scared him a little; sometimes it stung, like winter air; other times it left his heart feeling light and untethered. 

But right now, as he gazed over the sodden green fields of the Yaso school grounds and the dreary, low-hung clouds cast over them, thinking those words just made him feel hopeless. 

He tore his gaze from the classroom window and looked back down at his “notes” — a blank sheet of loose-leaf paper with nothing but the date written on it. It was hard to believe that just a few weeks ago Yosuke had been doing pretty well in his third semester (so well that his friends were starting to make fun of him for it, in fact). But he would be screwed if one of the teachers called him out in class today. He was barely aware of what subject they were even on.

He picked up his pencil and jotted down the last few words Mr. Hosoi said, not in an attempt to memorize any part of the lesson, but to keep his hands and mind busy. 

_I love him._

Yosuke bit his lip, scribbling aimless patterns across the margins. 

He hated being stuck in his own mind, walled off from the part of himself that could joke around and brush things off. He wished he could talk to his friends about this, but thinking about saying the words, “I’ve realized I’m in love with Yu,” felt impossible. His mind had already over-prepared him for those conversations and the possible scenarios were, quite frankly, a bit terrifying. Chie and Yukiko, especially, wouldn’t leave him alone about something like this; they might even try to arrange some sort of a confession. The very thought sent a chill up his spine.

So, even though he knew it wasn’t the best idea, he’d decided to keep it to himself. He was still trying to figure some things out about these feelings, anyway. He had to give himself time. That was why he was practicing.

_I love him._

So far, not a day had gone by that he hadn’t thought about the night it all hit him, when he woke up panting and sweat-soaked, still coming out of a nightmare where he couldn’t save Yu. It was always the same — black thing expanding and swallowing Yu up before he could get there, the same stupid relived trauma. He’d wake up, unable to breathe in his panic. 

But that night, the panic hadn’t just been the fear of watching his friend die, or even of failure. It had been the feeling of finding something beautiful at the bottom of the ocean that he’d let slip through his fingers, something shiny and rare and worth protecting, worth every bit of strength you had to hold onto it. The panic was that he’d lost it, finally, through sheer stupidity and fear, and through that total devastation . . . 

. . . Was the realization that he loved Yu Narukami, and that this love was so much deeper, fiercer, than every attempt he’d made to deny that truth. 

The epiphany — its sobering beauty uninhibited by the dregs of sleep — had settled over his skin like warm water in a shower. Even as the sweat began to dry on his skin, and he sat shirtless and trembling, he hadn’t felt _cold_. Something heavy inside of him had hummed, like an engine, and that sensation radiated throughout him. 

He had been forced to get up and tiptoe out of his room to get to the bathroom, thankful that Teddie was a pretty heavy sleeper most nights. While leaning over the sink and trying to get his bearings, he’d put his hand in the center of his chest. His hands had been clammy and shaky, but the heart beating against his palm had felt so warm, and _right_ where it belonged, not struggling under the weight of all the shit he’d been piling on top of it for years. 

He’d spoken Takehaya Susano-o’s name, quietly but a little desperately, and glanced into the mirror — startled, somehow, to see his own reflection staring back at him. The face had looked like his, with his brown, mussy hair and large, curious eyes set above a shallow sea of light freckles. Even so, Yosuke had barely recognized him. 

Since that night, Yosuke had been existing in and out of these thoughts in shifts throughout his days. He kept hoping it would start to feel normal, thinking it, that it would start to feel less like he’d just failed to wake up entirely that night. Had he finally come to terms with this? Would he be okay? Would his friendship with Yu be okay? Would these feelings go away, or would they keep him feeling this warm and free and terrified forever? 

Some of these he knew the answers to. For the ones he wasn’t sure about yet, he held onto the hope that he would get there if he tried. He was sure that optimism was Yu’s fault, who had always been unfailingly reassuring in darker times. Ironically, he could really use his advice right now. 

_I really do love him._

But this was something he needed to do on his own, at his own pace. He knew he would get to where he needed to be, eventually. Maybe then, he could tell Yu everything. 

_I love him,_ he wrote the words. In a tiny corner of his notebook, a secret he could fold away and treasure, he did it again. _I love Yu Narukami._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you very much for reading the first chapter of this short journey! i hope you guys enjoyed this installment and will stick around to see what happens. :D


	2. Happy Birthday, Yosuke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello. i want to formally apologize for this chapter upfront for 1) how long it is and 2) that it doesn’t have the most optimistic of ends. it's yosuke's birthday and all we want to do is shower him with presents and appreciation, and yet here i am posting chapter 2 of a very complicated and emotional journey. 
> 
> but i promise it gets better. it does! 
> 
> i wanted to put this here in case anyone reading this is sensitive to this kind of . . . icky emotional chapter ending, because if so, then i do recommend that you skip this chapter and catch up tomorrow after i post chapter 3! please practice self-care. <3
> 
> June 22: Yosuke's Birthday or Sunny

He woke up that morning to the sound of a text. 

Blinking blearily, reluctantly, Yosuke snuck his hand out of the covers and grabbed his phone. It was a few minutes before his alarm would go off, which made the interruption a little harder to take. He’d gone to sleep late again last night after playing video games with Teddie, who didn’t exactly have the best time management skills. 

His aggravation ended abruptly when he saw it was a text from Yu. He sat up at once, throwing the covers down and navigating to the message. 

**_Yu Narukami [6:15 AM]  
_ ** > _Happy Birthday, Yosuke. I hope you have a good day, even though it’s Monday. ;)_

Yosuke blinked at the message a few times, mostly confused. When he finally registered the gravity of the words, his heart began _pounding_. Then his face started feeling way too warm, and he tried to clear his head so that it would stop, so that Teddie wouldn’t see it if he happened to wake up. 

He put his phone down on the mattress and buried his face in his arms, which were holding both of his knees. He took one breath, two, deep ones, screamed internally at his heart to calm the hell down, and then he took a third breath. 

Without picking his head up, one of his hands reached out to grab his phone and slip the screen back into view beneath his knees. His eyes scanned the message once more before he found the courage to put his thumb on the keys and begin typing a reply. 

< _thx partner! Wud b better if u were here ;)_

 _That doesn’t sound too flirty, does it?_ He decided not to think about it and hit ‘send’ as fast as he could. 

He closed his phone and set it down, finally feeling his heartbeat begin to settle down. Reading that message had made him feel like a giant blob of hot glue. It was an entirely ridiculous and inappropriate way to react and it made him squirm. Granted, Yu had never wished him a happy birthday before, and Yosuke wouldn’t be lying if he said he would have never expected to get a “happy birthday” text from a friend. That was something girlfriends and boyfriends did.

It made him feel pathetic (and a bit creepy) to have reacted so strongly to something so innocent. Still. He couldn’t help but read the message over, just a few more times, before finally crawling out of bed. 

~~~

Yosuke’s chances of having nice weather on his birthday had always been split down the middle. Late June could get extremely wet, but that wasn’t the case today. The sun was clear and pale on the horizon and bathed all the trees and grass and roads in a gentle, rosy light. The cloudless sky made it feel a bit warm for it being so early in the morning, but there was a nice breeze coming off the river that cooled the back of his bare neck as he walked to school. 

None of his friends seemed to be around this morning, which was a little unusual but not unheard of. He probably wouldn’t have made good company, anyway, considering he was still thinking about Yu’s birthday text from earlier. 

As if sensing Yosuke’s thoughts, Yosuke’s pocket vibrated with another text message. His heart skipped a beat as he fished his phone out and flipped open the screen to see yet another text from Yu. 

**_Yu Narukami [7:09 AM]  
_ ** _ >Are you working tonight? _

Yosuke bit his lip as his stomach whirled excitedly. 

_ <nope! dad let me have off. _

He flipped his phone closed, wondering if Yu was going to continue. They’d never had a text-heavy friendship, often preferring to call one another. It was much easier for Yosuke to understand exactly what his partner meant when he could hear the sound of his voice, the pauses between his statements and his low, contemplative hums. And anyway, Yu was such a dork over texts with his perfect grammar and punctuation. Yosuke used to tease him about it before it became obvious that it made Yu self-conscious. 

**_Yu Narukami [7:10 AM]  
_ ** _ >Nice. Any plans? _

At the sight of another text, Yosuke felt that maddening heat from before begin to return to his cheeks, something he was helpless to stop. His partner could hardly be classified as the chatty type, so the stream of texts made him feel a bit . . . well, special. It was a feeling only Yu had ever made him feel before, and Yosuke realized then that it was a feeling that he’d missed since his friend had left. 

Feeling special around Yu was one thing, though. Feeling special _because of Yu’s attention_ was quite another. But as their conversation continued, Yosuke couldn’t help but find his friend’s behavior kind of strange.

Could Yu be planning something? He was certainly asking a lot of schedule-related questions, which threw Yosuke off, considering he had no plans whatsoever for his birthday. He tried to tamp down the persistent hunch that his friend’s texts had an ulterior motive — and tamp down even harder the imminent explosion of _feelings_ that hunch was giving him — as he finished his walk to school. 

If Yu was planning something, Yosuke didn’t want to be the one who ruined his own surprise, so he kept the conversation as nag-free as possible. He told Yu he would call him later if he was free, and Yu agreed. Then, Yu ended their conversation with a smiley face. 

Yosuke sighed deeply as he stood by his shoe locker, studying the emote as if he’d never seen it before, as if it was both a beautiful and absolutely heartbreaking sight.

_I love him._

~~~

To his complete but very welcome surprise, his friends wanted to celebrate his birthday after school. Of course, they insisted on going to Junes and Yosuke had groaned, but consented. It wasn’t like they had many other options. 

Once they got there, everyone chipped in and bought him food and snacks. Chie had even let him eat his grilled steak without sneaking a bite (or several). At one point, Yukiko shared a stirring sentiment on how proud she was that he was keeping his grades up, and Naoto had not only agreed, but questioned why he’d waited until third year when he’d clearly been “brilliant” all along. Yosuke had been left sitting red-faced, totally at a loss as to how to respond to that. He hadn’t been doing _that_ well, just . . . better. 

When they had all been about to leave, Kanji blurted out something and forced a thin, beaded keychain into Yosuke’s hand. It was mostly orange, with woven sections of silver and gold, and was exactly the kind of quality he would expect from Tatsumi. He thanked him, touched but embarrassed, and immediately put it on his keyring right in front of him, which Yosuke hoped told Kanji all he needed to know. 

Teddie spilled his melon soda in Yosuke’s lap, then tried to wipe it up with napkins covered in crumbs of caramel popcorn. 

All in all, he was in a pretty great mood by the time he and Teddie arrived back home. His mom stopped him on their way in, allowing Teddie to slip right past them and fly up the stairs to wash off the revenge soda that Yosuke had spilled on him. She told him they’d be having cake after dinner, and also, that a package had arrived for him. 

Initially, Yosuke felt nervous about having received any kind of mysterious “package”, but the smile on his mom’s face was quite disarming. “It’s from your friend, Yu!” she said excitedly, and Yosuke just as excitedly snatched it out of her hands. 

He placed it on the counter and tore open the wrapping, his mind racing about what it could be and what this could _mean_ , until he finally revealed the smooth surface of the package containing his gift: an upgraded music player, the exact one that Yosuke had been saving up for. He was stunned.

The text conversations from earlier were finally making sense to Yosuke, as he turned the box in his hands reverently. He stared at the label for a second and then pulled open the folded top of the box, sliding the contents out in their nesting tray. He stared at those, too. Just as he thought, this was exactly the one he’d wanted. He hadn’t even been close to being able to afford it.

Yu had never bought him a present like this before. He’d never really . . . bought him a present at all, except maybe for food. He’d never had the occasion to. 

_How did you do this, Yu? Why?_

He couldn’t believe that Yu had bought him such a thing. It wasn’t something an ordinary teen would just drop all their money on. Yosuke broke his back at work most of the week and even he had been struggling to save for this. Maybe Yu was better off than he thought, or they paid high school kids more in the city. 

He thanked his mom for receiving it for him and gathered up the box and the wrapping paper and dashed up to his room, where he laid everything out on his bed. He could hear Teddie singing in the shower down the hall so he took that chance to call Yu, his fingers trembling as he dialed.

“Hello, Yosuke.”

“Partner,” Yosuke laughed, realizing that he was close to crying. “What did you do?” 

“You finally got it? Is it the right one?” 

Yosuke laughed again, bewildered. “Uh, I mean, _yes_ ? H-how did you — I . . . _how_?!”

Yu chuckled into the receiver. He sounded sleepy, like he hadn’t used his voice in a while. “They’re selling them at the electronics store I’m working at, so I figured I’d pick one up for you for your birthday. I’m glad you got it; you didn’t call me so I was beginning to think it’d gotten stolen.” 

“Oh, nah, sorry. I just got home. I was out with Chie and the others.” 

“They took you out? That was nice of them.” 

Yeah, it had been, Yosuke would have agreed. But _this_ was far nicer. “Dude . . . I-I don’t even know what to say.” He stood there and gaped like a fish. “ _Thank you._ ” 

“You’re welcome, partner.”

He was too touched to speak anymore, and so amazed that it was real, that his mind began to race. Yu _really_ bought him this. He was a generous guy, but he wasn’t known to be overly careless with his money or spoil his friends with lavish gifts. He was a lot more like the rest of them — did what he could, chipped in when he was due, and helped Yosuke cover the rest of a karaoke bill when the group ran out of money. 

Why had Yu done this for him? Why this gift? Why _now_?

“Yu, why did you do this?” he blurted. Most of the time he regretted the things he said without thinking, but his mind was still reeling from the surprise and the emotions that came with it. Yu had texted him happy birthday, had planned a surprise gift for him when he got home, and had gotten him something Yosuke was still dreaming about. It _had_ to mean something. 

“Why?” Yu laughed. “It’s your birthday, isn’t it? When was the last time you celebrated it?” 

Yosuke scoffed. “I don’t even remember.”

“It’s nice, right? To get something special on your birthday.”

“Yeah,” he said, blushing, “especially from _you_.” 

It was a slip, one he would have regretted had he been thinking clearly. 

“I know how hard you’ve been studying this semester, Yosuke,” Yu continued, as if Yosuke hadn’t said anything at all. “I’m proud of you. You deserve to have something nice on your birthday.” 

Yosuke waited, listening closely to what Yu meant by those words. “So . . . wait, you bought this for me . . . because of my _grades_?” 

“Well, not entirely. You’re also my best friend, remember?” 

Yosuke chuckled, but it lacked gusto. He felt his heart start to sink, tugging his entire world along with it. His head swam as he dropped to his knees.

“But maybe you can use this as motivation to keep up the good work.” 

“Yeah.” He couldn’t feel his fingers or lips; they were buzzing. “I will,” he said lowly. 

“I’ll let you go. I’m sure you want to get it set up and everything.” 

Suddenly remembering he’d gotten an expensive music player for his birthday and that it was sitting right on his bed, he reached up and plucked it from its tray packaging. “Okay. Yeah, I’ll, um, probably talk to you this weekend?” 

“Sounds good.” 

“Thanks again, partner. This is . . .” Yosuke fished for words, trying to sound as sincere as possible. It felt like trying to breathe with his lungs full of splinters. “I’ve never gotten a gift like this from anyone that wasn’t my parents. I can’t believe I’m really holding this thing,” he managed, summoning all of his customer service skills. 

“I’m glad you like it,” Yu said warmly. 

They said their goodbyes and Yosuke hung up, the music player having grown warm in his palm. He set both that and his phone down on the floor and dropped his head in his hands.

Yosuke hadn’t fully realized it until Yu answered him, but he had been hopeful, for a second, that this gift had been because of something more, that he would get a bit of stuttering from his cool-headed friend as he awkwardly navigated around a confession. He had really been hoping . . . 

As idiotic as he felt, it was clear to him now — Yu simply didn’t think of him that way. The two of them weren’t even in the same ballpark. Yosuke was Yu’s best friend, and that was all. They would fight and die for each other, but when Yu looked at him, when he thought about Yosuke, he saw a friend, a trusted companion. He didn’t see what Yosuke saw when he looked at Yu, didn’t feel what he felt. 

Yosuke wasn’t sure if this peaceful feeling was the calm before the storm, or relief from the relentless anxiety he’d been suffering the past few weeks. It didn’t feel good, either way. He felt hollow, rotten, as if Yu’s words had scooped out his insides and dumped them on the floor beside him. 

Desperate, he put a hand on his chest and felt his heart — and it was _not_ hollow, but warm, right where it belonged. Still. Even though he felt confused and angry at himself, his heart hadn’t wavered in its conviction. That _should_ have comforted him. 

But the only thing it did was push him over the edge. He brought up his knees, hid his face in his arms, and tried to stay silent as hot tears began streaming down his cheeks. He watched them drip onto his floorboards, praying that Teddie wouldn’t walk in anytime soon. He still had to go downstairs and have dinner and cake with his family. But the tears kept coming, as if they’d been ready and waiting to fall for an eternity. 

Half of what hurt so much was finally knowing the truth about how Yu felt. But, the other half . . . 

He sniffed and wiped his face on his shirtsleeve. 

He knew, deep down, that he wasn’t ready to give up. His heart knew what he wanted, and until he could find the words to express what that even meant — and say them to Yu’s face — he knew nothing would change. 

He picked up the small music player and flipped it in his palm, running his thumb over the cool metallic back and, surprisingly, feeling something. He stopped and squinted at its surface, trying to see what it was through his tear-laden eyes. He could make out an engraving, but not what it said. He sat up on his knees and scooted over to the middle of his room to hold the device under the light — and there he saw it.

A simple engraving running top to bottom: _to my partner_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yu is so GOOD but he is just... he is also so fucking dumb. i'm sorry. he is trying his best. i'm sorry.
> 
> also i can't tell if this is like, a BAD emotional end or if i am just projecting Oo;; 
> 
> either way thank you for reading and sticking with me so far!!


	3. Study Session

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is less heartbreaking :) i am sorry for the wall of text before cute partner chats. :) 
> 
> June 23: ~~Feel or~~ Windy

October was almost over. The days were getting progressively shorter, windier, and Yosuke had transitioned to wearing his blue hoodie underneath his school uniform a few weeks early. He pulled the collar strings tighter as he turned down the main drag of the shopping district toward home, trying his best to keep the winds of early autumn off his neck. His headphones were keeping his ears warm, at least. 

As he walked, his brain tried to sort through the dump of information he’d absorbed in cram class that night. There had been too much, as always, but he’d taken excellent notes using a technique that Yu had taught him. It had allowed him to keep pace with the lecture without his brain having to comprehend everything at once, which meant that he had more time to learn the material on his own. It was a lifesaver in his days attending cram classes, especially since the exhausting schedule was finally beginning to catch up with him. 

He’d managed to keep his grades up this semester due to his renewed focus in class and the help of his friends. Enjoying not worrying himself sick over every test was precariously balanced with the reality that better grades meant that he was having to start putting serious consideration into what he wanted to do about college. It was a third year’s true burden, and Yosuke now understood how sobering a burden it was. 

He’d distantly decided around Golden Week that year to put “getting accepted into college” as a goal, but had no idea at the time that it would go this well. He’d been mostly lucky that something in his brain had just “clicked” at the start of the semester and he’d been able to focus more in class, which made homework easier, which had obviously resulted in easier tests and higher marks. Maybe not having a murder mystery to solve helped him prioritize better, but he also felt it had to be some latent survival instinct a lot of third years discovered when they realized college was only a year away. That was what cram schools were for, after all . . .

He’d only been attending cram classes focused on passing entrance exams for about a month, but he was already worn out. He never thought he would _miss_ busy shifts at Junes being his only after-school activity. The only things keeping him sane were his friends — and Yu, who he had weekly chats with. They were unfortunately too busy to talk much more than that. Cram classes and daily life usually kept them preoccupied during the week. They were both so focused on college and the entrance exams that Yosuke had even proposed that their usual Friday night calls turn into “study sessions”. 

Of course, that hadn’t lasted.

Yosuke just found it too tempting to talk to Yu about ordinary things, like what they’d eaten for dinner or what interesting movie or show was coming out or even trying to guess the last time Yu had bought himself a new piece of clothing. He found it tempting to talk to Yu about serious things, too. They talked a lot about their time after high school, about how things would change, what wouldn’t, where they’d be, where they wanted to be, and Yosuke _needed_ to hear Yu’s voice navigate them both through the hypotheticals. He was certainly looking forward to that tonight, after such a long week. 

His feelings for Yu hadn’t diminished at all over the months since his birthday. The only thing that had slackened at all had been the sting of realizing that his friend saw him as _only_ a friend, and not more than that. He’d had to let that feeling settle for a bit, like a drink that had gone sour, before he had been able to swallow the truth. 

He hadn’t been able to stop his friends from noticing his initial melancholy — not that he’d had the sense to hide it at the time. He’d managed to keep his mouth shut about his true feelings, placing the blame on the increase in schoolwork and generally just, missing his partner, which everyone seemed to understand. But while his feelings for Yu were still his deepest, most treasured secret, having his friends to distract him from their intensity made the ache from his birthday finally melt away for good. 

The months since had given him time to reflect. They had given his feelings for Yu time to heal. When he thought back on his birthday now, he remembered the music player, the token of friendship that Yu had lovingly surprised him with. He remembered the warmth in Yu’s voice as he wished him a happy birthday, as he told him that he was proud of him and to keep up the good work, and the sincerity in his every last word. 

It was a nice memory. Yosuke’s feelings for Yu had been so new and terrifying at the time that he hadn’t been able to see past their novelty, but now, months removed, he felt quite a bit different. It was like his feelings had been a new pair of shoes he’d just had to wear in. At first, they felt awkward and he wondered if they would start to hurt after a while, and make him regret ever considering them. But now, they made him feel confident. They made him walk straighter. They were snug and warm and felt amazing. 

He knew now, more than ever, that he _must_ confess.

He only needed to wait until Yu was ready to hear it, however long that took. When he pictured gently taking Yu’s hand and guiding him towards a beautiful view, finally _showing_ him, it made the idea of waiting feel easier. He knew the road would have its bumps, maybe even a few boulders, but there were times, just like now, when those fears hardly seemed to matter. He enjoyed being in love with Yu as a feeling all on its own, and he would have that no matter what Yu felt in return.

He ran his thumb over the little inscription in the music player, which was nestled in his jacket pocket. Just as he’d anticipated, he was getting a lot of use out of this thing, probably even more than he did out of his old one. With the increase in studying and the decrease in social activities, including work, he hardly ever found himself turning it off. 

He was nearing the bus stop now, the autumn winds having left his hair in disarray after his stroll through the desolate shopping district. He was starting to regret keeping his hair short like he had in the summer, but maybe it was finally time for him to just buy another scarf. He _used_ to have one . . . before Teddie took it. 

He’d just passed the bookstore when his phone buzzed. It was Yu — much earlier than usual. 

He pressed pause on his music player, pulled off his headphones, and accepted the call. “Hey, partner!”

“Hello, Yosuke.” 

Suddenly hearing Yu’s voice as he passed by the familiar shops on the very familiar main street hit Yosuke with a pang of nostalgia. Yu may as well have been walking right beside him. 

“How goes it?” he chirped, sounding more cheerful than he felt after the week he’d had.

“It goes well,” Yu chuckled. “Are you home yet?”

“Nah, I’m still on my way back from cram school. You back already?”

“Yeah, they let out early. I don’t think a lot of students are really taking their entrance exams seriously just yet.”

“I don’t blame them. I mean, it’s not even November.”

“January will be here before they know it.”

“Hey, _I_ don’t need reminding!” he chided, stopping in his tracks for a second. 

Yu laughed throatily. It sounded like he’d had a long day himself. Yosuke picked up the sound of Yu’s desk chair creaking as he stood up from it.

“ _Anyway_ , I’m glad you called early. This week really wore me out.”

“Then I’m glad I called early, too. Did your parents agree to relax your work schedule?”

“Yeah. It was just like you said, all I had to do was ask. My dad only wants me to come in whenever I feel like it. I don’t think he even put me on the schedule . . .”

“Great! I told you that your parents would work with you.”

“Yeah, yeah.” 

Yosuke had ended up feeling silly after Yu talked him through that obstacle. He hadn’t realized until then that he’d let his fear of disappointing his dad over work stuff inhibit him from opening his mouth about the stress of his schedule. He felt even sillier afterwards, when he saw how proud of him they appeared to be.

“So, could it be time for us to start treating these ‘study sessions’ like _actual_ study sessions?” 

A breeze blew over Yosuke’s neck and he huddled into the phone at his ear. “Nah, the studying is fine; it’s everything else that’s getting to me.”

Yu hummed. 

“I'm glad I don't have to worry about Junes anymore, but I’m still sick of having to spend all my time at Yaso. I know, I _know_ I have to go, but I still have _two whole months_ of this until entrance exams start. I'm not working anymore, but I still feel exhausted, and I don't know why. Am I just being a baby?” 

“No, you're not. You’re still working really hard every day — _of course_ you’re tired.”

Yosuke turned the corner at the bus stop, stopping to lean heavily against the stone wall. He sighed. “Are _you_ tired?” 

He waited a beat, concentrating on the sounds over the phone, the creak of Yu’s desk chair as he sat back down. “Well, not really. I’m used to being a good student.” 

“ _Dude_ ,” Yosuke groaned. 

“But I _would_ be tired if I had to rearrange my entire life for one goal. That’s not something everyone can just _do_ , Yosuke.”

Yosuke slumped against the bus stop wall, glowering at the empty street. 

“But _you_ can. You did it last year when we solved the case and you’re doing it again this year. Personally, I think you’re amazing.” 

Yosuke blushed immediately, though tried his best to ignore it as Yu’s last statement echoed in his mind. “. . . Really?” he asked, somewhat disbelieving. 

“Yes, I really do,” Yu chuckled. “It will get tougher before it gets better, but you got this. And you have me, too. You’re not alone.” 

Even though Yosuke knew Yu was right, hearing those words gave him mixed feelings. Yu was a million miles away, talking to him from a tiny bedroom in Tokyo. Missing him was just another daily pill. Despite whatever romantic feelings that he harbored for Yu, not seeing his partner’s face, having to settle for the electric ghost of his voice over a phone line, made the journey to college feel that much longer. 

There were days Yosuke wanted to see him so badly that he could barely breathe. He’d thought about saying that, “I miss you”, but he didn’t think that would explain enough. He didn’t know how to describe it, that a _part_ of what had been making the days harder was not having Yu’s physical shoulder beside him to lean on. 

He didn’t know how to describe that without . . . 

So he tried to pack it up as best he could. He didn’t want to confess over the phone — and certainly not tonight, at a bus stop in Inaba.

He hung his head and groaned. “Being a good student sucks.” 

Yu laughed. “It has its hazards. But you’re doing great, I promise. We’ll get there together.”

“Thanks, Yu,” Yosuke said, lowly, for the hundredth time since meeting his partner. He sighed. 

“You know that I’m here for you anytime you need me.”

Yosuke stood back from the wall and resumed his walk home, on legs that felt wobbly and achy. “So it’s okay if I call you at 3 in the morning when I have weird dreams?”

“Hmm. Depends on the dream.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you very much for your support and for reading this update \o/ and please be proud of yosuke for doing so good. <3


	4. Cover

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finally, a chapter where things happen! \o/
> 
> thank you to everyone who has been reading this story this week ;__; i have not been able to catch up on answering comments just yet, but please know that your words of support have really encouraged me. <3
> 
> June 24: ~~Sound or~~ Rainy

Dark clouds saturated the horizon above the trees lining Yosuke’s college campus. The wind was picking up, too, causing a few students to hurry down the pathways connecting their classroom buildings. The female classmate who Yosuke was talking to tucked her wispy bangs behind her ear after another gust of wind.

The two of them were standing under a large tree just outside of the science department. He’d met this girl the first day of his college semester when she’d asked to borrow his phone charger. That had been several weeks ago, and they still chatted after science class pretty regularly. She was cute and really funny, and was always very friendly towards him. She also liked a few of the same bands he did, so they’d been talking about an upcoming music festival quite a bit. 

They’d just gotten on the topic of tickets when Yu showed up to meet him. He was politely keeping his distance, standing by the stone steps to the science building while Yosuke chatted. When Yosuke spotted Yu, he waved at him, then said his goodbyes to his classmate. 

He and Yu didn’t manage to get into the same college, unfortunately, and Yosuke had felt pretty defeated about that at first. He knew getting into Tokyo U was an impossible dream for him, but it still stung to know that he and Yu wouldn’t be able to walk to class together like old times. However, he’d worked so hard during his third semester of high school that he’d had his choice of several other colleges, and chose one based partly on credentials, partly on location. Now, he and Yu were not only able to live in the same apartment complex, but they met up several times a week during their longer breaks to grab lunch. 

“Hey, partner!” he greeted, jogging over to where Yu was standing.

“Hey,” Yu mumbled, distractedly. 

Yosuke was _starving_ after having skipped breakfast that morning, and immediately began heading for the school’s massive cafeteria without stopping. It also looked like it was about to start pouring any minute, and he wanted to get to the food court dry. 

He was getting ready to ask Yu how his day was going when his partner piped up. 

“Who is that?” 

Yosuke glanced around, thinking that he might have been talking about one of the many random students walking to and from class. He looked over at Yu to question what he meant, but saw that his friend’s eyes were trained on something behind them, on the tree where Yosuke had been standing a few minutes ago. 

“Oh, Yamamoto? She’s from my science class. Pretty cute, huh?” 

Yu’s eyes continued to stare in her direction, and when Yosuke glanced back, he saw that she was indeed still standing beneath the tree, right where he’d left her. Yosuke looked back and forth between her and his partner a few times, nearly stumbling over his shoes as he tried to keep up their brisk pace towards the cafeteria. 

“You want me to introduce you?” he teased. He kept his tone light, but was helpless against the knob of aggravation that was growing in his stomach. He wasn’t used to Yu showing interest in girls, especially so blatantly. 

“No, thank you,” Yu dismissed, as if that were obvious, which immediately put Yosuke’s fears to bed. “She seems interested in _you_ , though,” he added. 

Yosuke nearly tripped again. “Huh?” 

“Don’t tell me you of all people didn’t notice,” Yu joked, with a small wry smile and a slightly mischievous glint in his eyes. 

Yosuke hummed, starting to feel hot under the collar. “Eh,” he shrugged. 

He considered saying something dismissive like “she’s out of my league”, but he bit his tongue. He didn’t want to give Yu the impression that he was interested in her, much less spur a debate about how “dateable” he was. He was currently kicking himself over saying that she was “cute” to begin with. He _definitely_ could have left that part out. 

He glanced over and saw that Yu was looking at him with an odd and uncharacteristic expression. “What?” he pouted. He could feel himself starting to blush. 

“I’m just wondering what would happen if you asked her out. From the way she was talking with you over there, it seems like that would go in your favor.” 

Yosuke looked away from the charming smile Yu was giving him and down the stretch of walking path they were on. They were just about to the cafeteria now — and just in time, because the clouds were getting heavier above them. 

“What’s stopping you?” Yu asked, his tone kind but probing. He halted their walk with a gentle touch on Yosuke’s elbow.

Yosuke suddenly felt too big for all of his clothes, too weak to carry his bag, too hot to breathe under that stare Yu was leveling at him. Sometimes Yu’s eyes made him feel like an ant trapped by the sunbeam in a magnifying glass. 

He floundered for how to respond, unsure how to lie about the fact that he’d failed, for weeks, to hit on a girl who was obviously interested in him. 

Eventually, he succumbed to telling at least the _partial_ truth. 

“She’s just not who I’m interested in,” he mumbled, swallowing thickly.

Yu furrowed his brow and his mouth opened — but before he could speak, he flinched. A water droplet had landed on his nose, and then Yosuke saw another, and another. 

Then, the heavens opened, and Yosuke grabbed Yu’s hand and beelined it towards the cafeteria’s overhang. It was only yards away, but the springtime shower didn’t let them go unscathed. By the time they reached safety, their clothes were half-way soaked. Other students had joined them, but many were still running with their bags and books overhead. 

Times like these, Yosuke was glad for his shorter hair. He shook his head, flinging water droplets everywhere, then he combed his bangs back. Yu adjusted his bag on his shoulder, unflappable even with the top half of his person soaked with rain.

“I didn’t even realize it was supposed to rain today. I didn’t bring my umbrella.” 

“You’re not alone, partner,” Yosuke laughed. He wondered if Yamamoto had been able to avoid the rain. 

Yu chuckled, and Yosuke glanced at him. “What?”

Yu had been looking at him, but at Yosuke’s question, Yu’s eyes flitted downward between them. 

And that was when Yosuke realized that he was still holding Yu’s hand. 

“Oh—” he said dumbly, staring at it. He felt frozen. 

Yu’s hand was in his. Not like it had been over the years, helping him up in the TV World, but like they were out for a romantic walk, and Yosuke’s heart immediately blossomed like the rows of flowers surrounding the school grounds.

“Um . . .” Yosuke squeaked. 

Yu merely stood there, patiently. He hadn’t jerked his hand back or given him a weird look. He was being calm and passive, and within that unexpected leniency, Yosuke felt a surge of longing, and greed, as if he had to take everything that Yu was offering him before it was too late. He had to memorize the solid, comforting weight of his friend’s hand holding his, which fit so naturally into his own, and the grooves in his skin and his strong knuckles from the year of sword-wielding, and how good his paler skin looked next to Yosuke’s bronze tone, and the pure happiness the sight radiated. 

Somehow, _somehow_ , he managed to let go. His fingers plucked free from Yu’s in a hurry, shaking from adrenaline and damp with rain. 

“Sorry,” he lied. His heart was pounding in his ear drums.

“You okay?” Yu asked. He still sounded calm, like before, but there was something else there. Yosuke couldn’t tell what it was; his heart was hammering too wildly. 

His skin was tingling where Yu’s skin had been and it made it hard for him to stand still. 

“Yosuke?”

“Yeah, I—” Yosuke shook his head. “I don’t know what came over me,” he laughed. It sounded shaky, too. “Sorry about that,” he said, flashing Yu an apologetic grin. 

Yu simply stood there and looked back at him for several, quiet moments, even after Yosuke looked away to watch the rain. He didn’t know how to protect himself from Yu’s gaze, the thoughts and feelings that it spurred, so he decided to let Yu stare for as long as he wanted. 

As he stood beside his partner beneath the overhang, breathing, fixing his eyes on the rain sweeping over the grass, the nice feeling spreading throughout Yosuke’s chest at their touch — a thing made of clouds and light, that defied gravity, a thing from deep within that hummed, like an engine — slowly fell back asleep. He sighed. 

Yu’s hand landed on his shoulder, and Yosuke heard his friend’s voice very near to his ear, rumbling like thunder into his bones. “Come on, let’s go eat.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tension :0


	5. Curry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they are still in college, and things are heating up ;) 
> 
> thank you again to everyone who has been reading this ;__; <3
> 
> June 25: Taste ~~or Snowy~~

Even though Yosuke and Yu hadn’t been able to find an apartment big and cheap enough for the both of them, just sharing a complex with Yu was good enough for Yosuke. They’d given each other keys pretty early on out of sheer convenience — Yu’s apartment was the one that had the washing machine (a rare luxury) and Yosuke’s apartment was in a quieter hall.

Yu’s apartment also had the better kitchen, which Yosuke was slowly learning how to navigate. To celebrate their moving to college and landing living spaces so close together, Yu had cooked them something on their first night in their new homes. It had taken him forever because Yosuke kept interrupting him with cooking and other unrelated questions, and Yu had been too kind and tired to stop him. They’d finally managed to eat, standing up at the counter, around 1am. Simple curry, but a meal Yosuke would never forget. 

There was no way Yosuke could ever replicate that special night. Yu wielded a kind of magic no one else did, with his careful, small smile and warm eyes. His skill at anything he put his mind to seemed utterly effortless, and while that had frustrated Yosuke quite a bit when he’d first met Yu, it was now one of his greatest sources of inspiration. 

Yu only believed in himself because his friends filled him with confidence, and the day Yosuke realized that was the day Yosuke understood that he and Yu were more similar than he used to think. The only difference was that Yosuke still felt compelled to extricate himself from that dependent feeling, whereas Yu had seemed to find peace within it. 

Finally finished with chopping his last carrot, Yosuke dumped the pieces in with the rest of the growing piles of veggies and chicken in the curry pot. 

He’d never made curry before on his own, except for instant. But he’d seen Yu make it so many times that he was flying through the recipe. He knew from helping Yu prepare it in the past all the little secrets and special touches Yu used to make the dish stand out. Yosuke’s stab at homemade curry still wasn’t likely to be as good as his partner’s, even with his arcane Yu-knowledge, but Yosuke was aiming for “pretty tasty”, which he thought was a reasonable goal. 

He stirred the contents to a low simmer, taking in the wafting spices and adding in a few more dashes to get the smell just right. Soon, he could let it simmer for a while until Yu got home from class.

Yosuke sighed, giving the curry another slow stir, and thought back on the moment they shared on campus the other day. That unbelievable interaction was one of the reasons Yosuke was in Yu's kitchen whipping up a homemade meal right now. Until that day, that moment, Yosuke had never been given a reason to think that confessing his feelings to Yu would end in anything but disappointment. He'd been _hoping_ for it not to, of course, all the months since he'd realized what he felt, but seeing actual evidence wasn't something that he'd been expecting at all.

And then, Yu had let Yosuke hold his hand. It still felt like a miracle, even if Yosuke had made sure it was just a brief touch. Even though it could also have been Yu messing with him a little, expecting him to get flustered and defensive about accidentally holding your guy-friend’s hand.

Yosuke had made it too obvious that he couldn't have cared less about that, though, and Yu — he had picked up on that. He had seen.

Yosuke thought, frequently, about what could have happened. He thought, if he had just tightened his hand over Yu's, if he had tugged him closer, had reached up with his free hand and brushed a piece of his dripping bangs back from his eyes, trailed his fingers after a raindrop as it streaked down his fair cheek. He thought about what the look in Yu’s eyes might have been like, what they might have seen then.

Yosuke hadn’t felt this close to something so important in two years, and his persona wasn't letting him forget it. It hummed happily almost constantly now, especially when Yu was around, or when he thought about him. It was as certain as an impending typhoon. He knew the time between pre-confession and post-confession was getting narrower, more rapidly, that the winds were picking up. 

It was hard, some days more than others, to figure out how to do the next right thing. For him. For Yu. 

But he hoped it could at least start with homemade curry. 

He tapped the wooden spoon on the pot and replaced its lid, setting the heat low to allow the curry to simmer. He’d brought his laundry along with the groceries, so he decided to start that while he waited. He checked Yu’s laundry, too, just in case, and grabbed the small pile of clothes in the bin. 

By the time Yu got home, the entire apartment smelled like curry and Yu and Yosuke’s clothes were strung up in the living room next to the window.

Yu set his bag down and toed off his shoes. “Hey.”

Yosuke peered at Yu from over the arm of the sofa. “Hey, partner!”

“Wow, smells amazing in here. Did you cook?”

Yosuke stood up and switched off the TV. “You don’t mind, do you? I was craving curry,” he answered sheepishly, smoothing down the back of his mussed hair. 

“Of course not,” he assured him, before stopping suddenly. “Uh, are those . . . _my_ clothes?”

“Uh!” Yosuke glanced at the line of laundry as if he wasn’t perfectly aware he’d hung up the clothes himself. “Y-you had some in your bin! And I just . . . figured . . .” 

Yu laughed into his hand, giving him a funny little smile. “It’s okay. I don’t mind that, either.” 

“Oh,” Yosuke blinked. “Uh . . . cool!”

“Actually, _thanks_ ,” Yu said, turning toward the stove. 

Yosuke felt so warm that he could have melted into Yu’s carpet where he stood. “No prob.” 

He threw down the remote and jogged into the kitchen to join Yu. Yu had taken off the lid and was stirring the curry, testing the tenderness of the veggies inside. Yosuke leaned over his shoulder and took another sniff, dramatically sighing in satisfaction.

“This looks perfect,” Yu admired, giving the dish another good stir.

“Not to pat myself on the back, but it kinda does,” he agreed, his voice muffled from the way his chin was resting on Yu’s shoulder. 

“Have you tasted it?” Yu asked.

“Nah, I wanted to wait ‘til you got home.” 

“You should always taste your dishes before serving them to guests,” Yu lightly chastised. 

Yosuke picked his chin up. “But . . . this is your apartment. _I’m_ the guest.” 

Yu stopped stirring. “Huh. Can’t argue with that.” 

“But I _did_ make the curry, so I guess I should still be the one to taste it and make sure it’s suitable for your fancy-pants palate.” 

Yu grabbed a spoon from the dish rack and dipped it in the curry, picking up just a sample-sized bite with a piece of potato. He brought it up to Yosuke’s mouth, who was still hovering over his shoulder. 

He didn’t quite bring it close enough, probably because he was trying to avoid spilling any on his shirt. Yosuke put his hand on Yu’s back as he leaned over more, towards the spoon, blowing on it a few times before Yu guided it through Yosuke’s lips. 

It was perfect, and he hummed as he took in the flavors. Although he’d been expecting it to taste just like normal Yosuke was still relieved to find this was true. Strange, how the tasks Yosuke considered himself lackluster in were proving not to be as much of a challenge when he could truly focus on them. 

“H-how’s that?” Yu asked. His voice was low, nearly a whisper. 

“Really good,” he answered. He leaned back to stand up straight, his hand sliding off of Yu’s back as he did so. “I _did_ do a good job!” 

Yu quirked a smile. “Of course you did; don't be so surprised.” Then, he bit his lip and looked down, heat spreading into his cheeks from the simmering curry pot.

Yosuke’s shoulders slumped bashfully and he grinned. “Awww, thanks, partner. Ready to eat?” 

Yu chuckled softly and tossed the tasting spoon in the sink. “Can’t wait.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yu, just stick your head in the freezer man. its cool we've all been there.


	6. Island

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> June 26: ~~Scent or~~ Stormy

Even though the wind and rain were lashing the living room windows and thunder crackled and rolled overhead, Yosuke was finding it hard to stay awake as his nose hovered over his textbook.

They’d been at it for hours, pouring over notes in preparation for their first set of college exams. Yosuke’s living room floor was ground zero, littered with notebooks and textbooks and pens and balls of crumpled paper, old mugs and empty snack boxes, with phone and laptop charging cords snaking through the spread. Yu and Yosuke were stranded somewhere in the middle, their bellies perched on floor pillows and their legs smothered in blankets. 

Maybe it was the comfy atmosphere, or the steady pattering of rain outside, or the inevitable crash from finishing off the last of their instant coffee packs, but all of the formulas scrawled in Yosuke’s notebook were starting to blur and converge into one, very intimidating puzzle. 

He shook his head and blinked several times, then nudged both his notebook and textbook back a few inches. “Hey, partner? Did you grab any energy drinks from the corner store?” 

Yu didn’t look up from whatever it was he was writing. “No, I didn’t,” he murmured. After a beat, he finished and put down his pen, giving Yosuke his full attention. “I can run over and grab some, though, if you want.” 

Yosuke pulled his mouth to one side in a gracious grin. “Nah, don’t worry about it. Maybe all I need is some water.” 

“I’ll grab it for you,” Yu insisted, rising to his feet. His blanket fell and pooled around his socked ankles as he reached towards the sky in a big stretch. Yosuke watched him, laughing softly when he heard his friend’s bones crack and pop from stiffness. 

Then Yu turned around and delicately navigated his way through the spray of study materials on his way to the fridge, and Yosuke watched that, too. 

He sighed and finally put his eyes back where they belonged — on his math review problems. He itched to check his phone (mainly their group chat so that he could complain a bit), but sadly, knew that wouldn’t be happening. 

It had taken some convincing by Yu, but Yosuke had reluctantly agreed to keep his phone on silent and out of his hands for the duration of their studying. In return, Yu agreed to let Yosuke keep his laptop open so that he could plug in his gifted music player and fill the room with some music for background noise. Yu had never had issues with focusing like Yosuke, so Yosuke knew that he would be able to play whatever he wanted without bothering him too much. 

While the sounds of weather, someone talking in the distance, being interrupted while he was _actually_ focusing — all of these distractions had spelled doom for Yosuke’s study attempts growing up. That was why attending cram school at Yaso had been so critical for him. It was also why he was glad to have his partner here, to keep him in check. 

He was glad to be with his partner for many reasons, of course, least of all because he was a great task manager.

Tonight’s study session was proving that to be truer than ever. Unlike their days of long-distance “study sessions” over the phone back in high school, Yosuke’s study sessions with Yu in their college days were quite differently managed. Yu let him have all the snack and pee breaks Yosuke wanted, but hadn’t been shy about putting the lid on conversations Yosuke started that had nothing to do with their test subjects. 

On a typical day, Yosuke might have found that to be patronizing and annoying, but tonight, it made him feel weirdly . . . pampered. Yu knew what Yosuke was capable of, and he knew what Yosuke needed to stay on track. He found that immeasurably comforting, actually, because it meant that he had someone in his life who was willing to help the littlest, weakest parts of him.

College hadn’t been nearly as hard as he had expected it to be, and the slackened culture compared to high school had definitely thrown them both off their game. They had been able to spend more time hanging out and less time worrying about grades. But now that term was coming to an end and exams and essays were popping up in their classes, it was clear that preparing for them was just as challenging as it had been in high school. Even Yu was more focused on their progress than he used to be, but then certain exams at Tokyo U were probably no cake-walk.

Yosuke smiled as he remembered how Yu had shown up at his door that evening, holding a small grocery bag full of snacks in one hand and carrying his study materials on his shoulder. Yosuke had _almost_ asked him if Yu thought he'd fare better doing this with his Tokyo U classmates, since their course materials and exam prep were entirely different. Instead, he'd smirked and let him inside, and Yu's return smirk as he passed him to head into the living room had burned a heated blush onto Yosuke's cheeks.

A water bottle entered the top of his vision. Startled, Yosuke blinked his eyes awake and grabbed it. He was still lying on his arms, so he had to lift himself up on his elbows to unscrew the cap and drink. 

“How do you feel about your progress?”

Yosuke swallowed and glared at his math. “I’ve stagnated, I think.” 

Yu sat back down on his pillow cross-legged and sighed. “Well, maybe hydrating will help.” 

“M’sleepy,” he mumbled.

“You don’t want to fall asleep yet,” Yu chuckled. “You’ll be upset when you wake up and have no more time to study for math.” 

Yosuke groaned, lowering himself back down to the floor. 

“Try and get through one more page of review problems. Then you can give your brain a rest.” 

Yosuke groaned again. 

Yu laughed. “Or just lie there.” 

Yosuke made more noises of discontent as he tugged his work materials closer by the tips of his fingers. He did owe it to Yu, after all. A crack of thunder reverberated throughout the house, and Yosuke reluctantly reached for his pencil. 

~~~

His fortitude had lasted all of twenty minutes before Yosuke was using the cool pages of his textbook as a pillow, unwinding to the sounds of harsh rain at the window. He hadn’t gotten snapped at yet, probably because Yu knew he’d gotten through _two_ pages of review problems before collapsing. He was lying facing his partner, who had very nearly given up on studying himself, though he still looked mostly awake. 

Yu was lying on his side, head propped up on his elbow, idly twirling his pencil in his hand as his eyes trailed over his notebook. 

Yosuke had seen Yu look exhausted plenty of times, but usually in a different context, a context Yosuke didn’t like revisiting when he could help it. Study-tired Yu had a different air. His face wasn’t darkened in concern or guilt, but remained smooth and fair. His gray eyes were a little stormy, a little puffy, and his lips a little red, as he worried the bottom one between his teeth. 

His jaw was sharp and beautiful in the accent lighting of Yosuke’s living room, and it was amazing to Yosuke that Yu could even lie there, _existing_ , without realizing that. Even the dumpy sweatshirt he was wearing, that draped over his waist with folds like fingers running down to his stomach, made him look angelic. 

He had been in love with him for longer than just last year, Yosuke understood that, but he truly couldn’t remember Yu _ever_ looking this good. 

As he lie there, his breaths slowing as he concentrated on the contours of his partner’s figure, something inside of him began to hum. Like an engine. He had Yu, this amazing person, precious and worth protecting, lying here in his apartment on a stormy night, lying close enough to touch, to breathe in the smell of his shampoo. He wanted to have him forever, forever and ever, looking beautiful and spending time together, sharing these stormy nights and sunny days, sharing amazing meals and jokes that made Yu’s small smiles bloom over his bright face. 

He wanted to give Yu everything he could ever want. He wanted to offer Yu all of the moments and dreams and the life that Yosuke had been saving just for him. 

“Thanks for this,” he mumbled. 

“Hm?” Yu hummed, glancing up from his books and looking directly at Yosuke. His skin looked rosy and soft in the light.

“Thanks for coming over and being with me,” he elaborated, words still a bit slurred, his eyes getting lost in the slow blink of Yu’s eyes, the way his hair fell over them exquisitely, and the warm smile that was forming on Yu’s face at his words. 

“I was more than happy to. It was my idea, remember?”

“I’m glad you’re here,” he continued. His tongue was thick and getting in the way of his words, but Yu looked so good, and beautiful, and Yosuke loved him terribly, so _terribly_. “I’m glad you’re my partner . . . You mean everything to me . . .”

He couldn’t really see Yu’s face anymore, but he saw Yu’s hand put down the pencil and reach out toward him. Then, he felt cool fingers brush his forehead, and comb through his hair. 

“I love you . . .” 

He pictured them both on a beach, sprawled over the sand. Just them and the skies and the ocean, the sounds of birds and rippling waters at their feet, the wind gentle across their cheeks and bare shoulders. He imagined Yu’s lips, a little red, parting, beckoning his own parched lips like ripened fruit. Yu’s eyes slowly blinking against the sun, pale and captivating. He could almost feel the smooth brush of Yu’s thumb over his cheek, over his lips. 

_“I love you, too.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :3


	7. Narukami

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am one day late D: 
> 
> the truth is, this was the only chapter i hadn't pre-written before Souyoweek started, so i have been trying to work on it as i was tidying up and posting the other chapters throughout the week. it took a lot of effort and i stayed up until after 4 in the morning, but i conquered it. i conquered it with my bare hands. :) 
> 
> now that this story has come to an end, i want to thank everyone who stuck with it from day 1 and read every single day until the last chapter. 7 days may not seem like much to others, but to me it means the whole world. <3
> 
> this entire story has been about yosuke's journey, so for the last chapter i decided to turn it around and show how our boy yu has been coping. ;D
> 
> June 27: ~~Sight or~~ Foggy

Yu clasped his hands together as he looked down at the dark waters of the slow-swirling lake before him. He was leaning over the stone railing on top of the quaint bridge in the small, neighborhood park, the surrounding fog crowding his shoulders and obscuring his view of the edges of the shore where the lily pads liked to gather and bloom. The sun was setting. Soon, he would be alone out here, the company of the hazy sunset replaced by the croaking of nearby frogs and the buzzing of early summer insects. 

And Yosuke, when he joined him. 

Despite having some mid-sized butterflies about what he was prepared to do when that happened, the rest of him felt shockingly calm. Calm had saved his life when he moved to Inaba, and it was a fairly accurate descriptor of his usual personality. But tonight, he wasn’t calm because his head was somewhere else. He wasn’t even calm because he _had_ to be. He wasn’t calm because his _lack_ of calm would have meant that he wouldn’t be able to save his friends’ lives or defeat a god. 

Simply put, he was calm because he knew that his heart was right where it needed to be. 

He counted the ripples in the water where the dragonflies landed and took off, where the koi and ayu vainly nipped at them. Tendrils of fog creeped ever inwards as the sun finally sank beyond the horizon and the comfortable warmth of the summer night cocooned him deeper in his thoughts. 

Since last night, Yu hadn’t stopped thinking about Yosuke, about the peaceful look on his face as he fell asleep to the melody of his own confession. He wondered if Yosuke had any idea how warm his words had made Yu feel as he lie across from him, his heart thrumming and reaching out to catch each one of them as they tumbled from Yosuke's lips. He’d turned them over and over, over and over, like the cards he used to crush. 

The words should have shaken him, he’d remembered thinking at the time, but they hadn’t. Not at all. _“You mean everything to me.” “I love you.”_ They’d felt smooth like a river-worn stone, and settled neatly inside of him like one of the seedlings he and Nanako used to plant in their backyard garden. They belonged there. They had always belonged there. 

And saying it back had felt as natural as hearing it.

He realized when Yosuke took his hand that day in the rain that he loved him, that he’d _been_ loving him for years. Since that time, he’d considered the years of friendship they’d shared. He considered his own life, and the many directions it had taken up to this point.

One day, he’d been a lonely kid, wondering if anyone would ever look up from their books or laptops and _see_ him. He wondered if he would ever matter to a single person, if he would die ever mattering at all. The next day, he had irreplaceable memories and even more irreplaceable friends who had renewed his hope in, not only the world, but in himself. 

The day after that, he discovered that a person with whom he shared an unbreakable bond could cause that bond to transform, and blossom, expand across the plain of space to a distance and magnitude beyond human understanding, and the realization — hitting at mid-afternoon on a college campus as he stared at his best friend — had left him breathless and euphoric, like he’d seen a glimpse of heaven. 

Even at this moment, he had no idea what Izanagi would look like if he were able to summon him, and the idea exhilarated him. 

He’d packed up as quietly as he could last night, taking a moment to scribble a note for Yosuke and stick it to his phone before leaving. He’d asked Yosuke to meet him here, at the park around the corner of his part-time job. They didn’t spend much time here together, but Yu had come here a lot lately to think. It was a beautiful place to sear into memory; even the fog held soft beams of light from the posts that lined the park’s walking path. 

“Partner?” 

Yu stood and turned towards the sound of Yosuke’s voice, smiling at his approaching figure that appeared out of the fog as if he were a gift from nature herself. He was wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans, his headphones tucked safely around his neck. 

“Ah, there you are. Sorry to keep you waiting,” Yosuke said, scratching the back of his head. 

Yu stepped towards him — closer than he might have on any other night — and reached out to take Yosuke’s hand. “I think that’s my line.” 

Yosuke froze, his eyes and jaw falling open. He looked down at their hands, as Yu took Yosuke’s fingers and threaded them through his own. 

“That wasn’t a dream,” Yosuke mumbled, eyes floating back up to scan Yu’s face. 

Yu gave him a small smile, slightly plaintive, slightly vulnerable, as he stood with nothing but love and hope in his heart. He shook his head and leaned in closer. “It wasn’t a dream.” 

Yosuke blinked, scanned Yu’s face once more, then rushed forward and crushed their mouths together. 

Immediately, Yu sank into him with one, long breath. He’d never kissed anyone before, but with Yosuke, it hardly felt new. The warm softness of his lips against his, the slight give in them as Yu pressed further, the faint moan in the back of Yosuke’s throat that Yu could feel rumble into his skin, every bit of it felt like breathing in Inaba’s country air, like the lazy weekends they spent cooped up in Yosuke’s apartment. It felt like a dream he’d once had, a feeling of finding something precious and never letting go. 

Too soon, it ended, with Yosuke breaking them apart and panting, panting like mad against Yu’s lips. Yu opened his bleary eyes to see that Yosuke’s jaw was trembling, brows drawn and eyes slammed shut. Yu stared, taking in the sight like it would run away from him any second. 

“S-sorry,” Yosuke stuttered. He took one small step back, but Yu wouldn’t let him get far with their hands intertwined. “I was supposed to, um, _say_ something before I did that.” He looked up into Yu’s eyes shyly.

“What’s there left to say?” Yu asked. His voice was husky but he found it hard to care while he was still staring at Yosuke’s mouth. 

Yosuke huffed against Yu’s lips, his eyes fluttering closed. “I’ve had so much to say for so long, and it comes out while I’m falling asleep on my living room floor.” 

“Technically, it was your textbook,” Yu corrected. 

Yosuke shot him a “look” and Yu glanced down and chuckled softly. He squeezed Yosuke’s fingers in his apologetically, and Yosuke’s expression softened. He squeezed back. 

He leveled a gaze at Yu and opened his mouth, then stopped, as if not knowing where to start. Yu could have stood there for an eternity waiting for him to speak, getting lost in all the ways his friend’s face had matured over the years, from delicate to downright handsome. 

Finally, after searching Yu’s eyes, Yosuke closed his mouth. “I love you,” he said, simply, as if it were the only thing that mattered. 

Hearing it once again, though, didn’t feel simple. Yu’s heart had been skipping along to a new rhythm their kiss had caused, and hearing that made it settle into a slow waltz that took him forward in time, through all the years they would spend together with Yosuke declaring it again and again. 

“I love you, too,” he whispered back, closing their distance. “I’ve always loved you.” 

Yosuke’s fingers wove into Yu’s hair as he pulled them both together again, the fog wrapping around them as they wrapped around each other. Yosuke tore his mouth apart and Yu let him, eager to show Yosuke all the things that Yu still hadn’t said himself. He had time now, though. 

They both did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \o/ 
> 
> thanks for reading! <3
> 
> epilogue? Y/N?


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